TRADGE LODGE

Uuuuuuuniversity.

1 week after moving to Essex I wrote a blog about moving to Essex. 7 weeks later at 4.27am in the morning I have decided to post it. I’m sure by 15.04 tomorrow I will have deleted it, Enjoy.


So I live in Essex now. ITV 2 kinda messed up the reputation of this whole county but I’m actually somewhere that has lots of books and is surrounded by fields. I also read that if you live in Essex you are 38% more likely to be hit by falling aeroplane parts than anywhere else in Britain. However I did read that fact on this website:

http://www.essexherald.com/strangeessexfacts.htm

…so I don’t think it’s actually true. Did you know 9/10 statistics are made up?


If we’re pals you probably know I spent all of last year going “I DON’T WANNA GO TO UNIVERSITY I’M NOT GOING!!! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME MUM!! I’M GONNA DO MY OWN THING!!!” And then I got too scared to do my own thing and ended up going to university. So, yes, a reason I am at university is because I behaved like a sheep. Interesting decision as you should never do something just because everyone else is doing it, especially not something that is going to cost you tens of thousands. I think that it’s not real money because no money was made to line a briefcase and I can’t actually see this money we speak of. Then again I also think the cash point isn’t real money after a glass of wine.

Despite feeling like that before, I’m actually so glad I came - thank you for asking. Here are some more thoughts on being a big girl now:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~PROS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  • Curly fries with cheese on them about 1 minute and 7 seconds from my flat.


  • Everyone lives round the corner. Excellent. No more 1 and a half hour night bus journeys home.

  • Rediscovering orange squash. Hey 7 year old me, you were so right about this drink, good job. Hey flatmate, what’s that you’ve got there? Orange juice? Are you a fucking millionaire or something?


  • Stationary. I bought a shit load of nice stationary and it is SO exciting. I also bought a 35p pencil case from Tesco. At the time I thought it might be a risky move. I was right. NO ONE ELSE HAS ONE.* They don’t mention important things like stationary etiquette anywhere on the UCAS website and pengate has been one of the most stressful moments of my higher education so far. I also just googled ‘pencilcasegate’  and this wonderful photo appeared: https://www.facebook.com/FGBingo/posts/385373041525774. You’re welcome.


  • It’s quite a small university. Awww that’s nice, just a quick stroll to get my curly fries and I see four people I know. Two will say hi, one wont see me, and one will pretend they didn’t see me. Excellent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~CONS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  • Curly fries with cheese on them about 1 minute and 7 seconds from my flat.


  • Everyone lives around the corner. In London if you meet someone on a night out and really embarrass yourself you’re likely to never see them again. If you do see them again, it probably wont be for at least a few weeks. By that time you can both pretend you don’t remember, or if you are forced to talk about that night you can say something vague yet funny that you have had two weeks to plan. Here, you embarrass yourself and you see the person 6 times. The next day. Before you’ve had time to take off last nights make up.

  • I’ve seriously let myself go. I have been drinking wine straight from the bottle. I know, I know, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking Roisin you are an absolute monster. There is a picture on the internets of Rihanna doing it and she looks really cool but (spoiler alert!) I am not Rihanna. I do not look cool whilst doing it. Let me explain: I am not a classy person at all. My hairdresser telling me I should only wash my hair twice a week was the best day of my entire life. I’m not joking. It’s gonna be up there with the birth of my first child and the day Lady Gaga quits music and decides to become a mime artist. Having a proper wine glass in my hand is one of the only times I get to feel like Drew Barrymore and it is a cracking time for all involved.(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_celebrities_who_own_wineries_and_vineyards . Ooooh, I wonder what Sting would make of Lil Jon’s wine?)


  • Getting searched when you exit the library. Seriously lady? What year is this? Why don’t you get some of those electronic beep beep things? I’m not trying to enter the statue of liberty here I just want to take my highlighters and sparknotes elsewhere.


  • My new addiction to the World Wide Web. I’ve never been that fussed about the internet before but yesterday I was sitting so still scrolling through Facebook that the light in my kitchen that runs by a sensor went off. That’s not healthy. Probably wouldn’t even happen to Zuckerberg himself. Not sure why Zuckerberg would be in Wivenhoe but you never know, Silicon Valley might get boring.


  •  Student Union photographer. The only thing worse than someone taking photos of you on a night out is someone taking photos of everyone apart from you on a night out.
— 4 months ago with 1 note
#unversity  #essex 

My new favourite thing is ridiculous(ly overpriced) lighting. Urban Outfitters have the best selection. The tooth lamp and the bear lamp are my happy place.

— 6 months ago with 2 notes
#seriously the bear urrrrghhhh LOOK AT HIM  #urban outfitters  #lighting  #lights 

This song makes me wanna be fifteen with pink hair living in Cornwall and hanging out at the local fish and chip shop because the local hunk from the all boys school across the way hangs out there and he’s nineteen but he sometimes shares him chips with me so Layla thinks he likes me but i’m sure he doesn’t however he did ask me if I wanna come over and listen to his Belle & Sebastian record before Jeff’s party on Saturday oh man I can’t wait for Jeff’s party on Saturday.

— 6 months ago with 4 notes
#the cribs  #leather jacket love song 

emma-pelham:

Finally got round to uploading some of the stuff I did for my art foundation FMP, these are images which were in a zine I made on female biker gangs.

♡ Talented pal ♡

— 9 months ago with 1 note

Oh hey Tumblr! Been a while. Here is my favourite song of the moment, some bloody cracking lyrics.

— 9 months ago with 4 notes
#YES YOU DO WANNA KNOW  #sounds good on a train to croydon  #arctic monkeys  #do i wanna know  #alex turner 
Three Birds.

I wrote a review on a piece of theatre I went to see for a competition. I didn’t win. Here it is. It’s a bit liiiiiiitle bit smug Evening Standard-y but it is my first review/haven’t written anything longer than 140 characters in a while:

I am suspicious of a play without an interval. Why don’t they have an interval? Is it so bad we will all want to escape halfway through and never leave the house again? I, personally, like to break up a piece of theatre with an overpriced bag of Kettle Chips and a minute glass of wine - so it goes without saying that me and ‘Three Birds’ did not get off to the best start.

However I was slowly won over when I realised Janice Okoh had possibly the best venue in London for her Bruntwood Prize winning ‘Three Birds’. An old library, The Bush Theatre creates a secret and intimate environment for the audience from the moment they enter. This suits Okoh’s play perfectly, as the audience are planted straight in the sibling’s living room and do not leave for ninety (interval-less) minutes. 

'Three Birds' revolves around three siblings coping with suddenly living on their own in South London. It is a story of loyalty and survival. As the story unfolds, the audience feel right at the center of their situation, not just their living arrangement. Everytime the performance teeters dangerously towards becoming unbearably sad, Okoh throws in a silly joke and the audience respond with beside themselves laughter. Something tiny, such as the three main characters can all be referred to as 'T’, releases enough tension for the play to stay just on the side of an enjoyable night out.

As the children are forced to let Dr Feelgood and Ms Jenkins into their private surroundings, the audience are let in on the truth. Phenomenal acting performances particularly from Susan Wokoma, who plays 9 year old Tanika, make the audience root for the children even as the grizzly truth unfolds and becomes almost impossible to watch. Though perhaps it would not help them, everyone in the room wants the children to stay together and feels anger at society for wanting to split them up. Society is represented through Ms Jenkins, she feels she has to patronise a very uninterested Tionne with her sock puppet to get her point across, and we feel she is the one who does not get it.

Although one explicit action by Tanika at the end of the play is not necessary, and perhaps takes away from the previous eighty five minutes, overall the play has no definitive ending - and this works. Tanya Rodner’s adaptation of ‘Vernon God Little’ demonstrated a plot can be bleak, full of despair and a clever use of lighting, timing and music can make it hilarious and uplifting. Janice Okoh however demonstrates a plot can be bleak, full of despair, and clever tricks do not have to be used in order to make it uplifting. With her ninety minute production she breaks the repetitive pattern of theatre and all story telling.

Okoh creates a type of theatre we desperately need more of. It is accessible and intimate, much like the library that is the venue for ‘Three Birds’.

— 9 months ago
#thespian thrills  #I DIDN'T MEAN TO LINK UP THE BEGINNING AND END I HATE THAT  #janice okoh  #bush theatre  #theatre  #london  #bruntwood prize 

Unsubscribed from a Thai Restaurant email list because they sent me more emails than anyone else and I was only on it because I love entering competitions in Restaurants that I never win:

We’re sorry to see you go.

Was this a mistake? Did you forward one of our emails to a friend, and they clicked the unsubscribe link not realizing they were in fact unsubscribing you from this list? If this was a mistake, you can re-subscribe at: ”

— 2 years ago
#CLINGY!!!!! 
Before I write anything about the TV show Homeland I think I should tell you I am actually very proud of myself for liking a programme so deep, a programme that is not set in Los Angeles and a programme that is not about the problems surrounding teenagers.
OKAY.
I am very late on jumping on board with Homeland but hey, better late than never. I actually think I might have a heart attack if I watch more than two episodes in a row. And this heart attack wont just happen because vidxden has frozen it will happen because I CAN’T TAKE IT!!!! HAS HE TURNED OR HAS HE NOT!!!! FUCK YOU MIKE!!!! I LOVE YOU SAUL!!!! CARRIE PLEASE SPEND TIME WITH YOUR NIECES!!!! JESSICA YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!

Before I write anything about the TV show Homeland I think I should tell you I am actually very proud of myself for liking a programme so deep, a programme that is not set in Los Angeles and a programme that is not about the problems surrounding teenagers.

OKAY.

I am very late on jumping on board with Homeland but hey, better late than never. I actually think I might have a heart attack if I watch more than two episodes in a row. And this heart attack wont just happen because vidxden has frozen it will happen because I CAN’T TAKE IT!!!! HAS HE TURNED OR HAS HE NOT!!!! FUCK YOU MIKE!!!! I LOVE YOU SAUL!!!! CARRIE PLEASE SPEND TIME WITH YOUR NIECES!!!! JESSICA YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!

— 2 years ago with 1 note
#My Mum fancies Damien Lewis  #ABU NAZIR!!!!  #Homeland  #TV 
"Now, it’s very easy for me to stand on a metaphoric soap box and say that, unlike Samantha Brick, I believe my value comes from my intelligence, kindness, wit and moral courage. In real life, however, I don’t start my day by reading Erasmus and doing charity work. I start my day by curling my hair and putting make-up on my face so that I look pretty."
— 2 years ago with 17 notes
PRIORITIES

So. I’m not really into fashion at all. I’m a total magazine junkie but skip past all the bits about fashion and beauty (don’t get me wrong I love clothes and make up I just don’t care to read about it) which generally means there is only about four pages of the magazine left. However, in Topshop in Essex I found the most E-M-A-Y-Z-I-N-G dress. It was nude coloured and it had sequins and it was backless and it was ridiculously overpriced and it had a floaty bottom and it was perfect. I was with a male friend and told him at that moment in time after eighty seconds of silence that that was the dress he was going to marry me in (I know how to play it cool. Maybe I should pay more attention to these magazines I am reading?) 

This is the part of the story where I tell you Essex is about two hours away from me.

I didn’t buy the dress there and then but decided I was going to get it online as soon as I got home. You know that feeling when you see something that you need in your life and you would swap your left leg and third best friend for. It was one of them moments. 

…It’s not on the website. It’s not on the website. It’s not on the website.

— 2 years ago
#Anyone have Philip Green's mobile number?  #TOPSHOP 

Only heard them pretty recently…and am totally in love…

EDIT: Went a bit crazy spur of the moment and bought a ticket to see them next week. E X C I T I N G.

— 2 years ago
#the shins 
My ma begged me to come and see this with her and guess what? I loved it. She hated it. 
Apparently it hasn’t received very good reviews but I thought it was hilarious. About 20 minutes into the film I realised I want to be best friends with Bill Nighy. HE’S JUST SO COOL. A couple of years ago I went to see Bob Dylan at the O2 and he was in front of me in the queue to buy a overpriced programme. He likes Bob Dylan and programmes?! S-s-s-s-oulmates. I hope this is where the thought process ends and it doesn’t turn into that time when I decided I wanted to be best friends with Daniel Radcliffe and watched just about every interview with him (he’s just so polite.)
THIS JUST IN: My eighty-something year old Great Aunt LOVED it. There you go.

My ma begged me to come and see this with her and guess what? I loved it. She hated it. 

Apparently it hasn’t received very good reviews but I thought it was hilarious. About 20 minutes into the film I realised I want to be best friends with Bill Nighy. HE’S JUST SO COOL. A couple of years ago I went to see Bob Dylan at the O2 and he was in front of me in the queue to buy a overpriced programme. He likes Bob Dylan and programmes?! S-s-s-s-oulmates. I hope this is where the thought process ends and it doesn’t turn into that time when I decided I wanted to be best friends with Daniel Radcliffe and watched just about every interview with him (he’s just so polite.)

THIS JUST IN: My eighty-something year old Great Aunt LOVED it. There you go.

— 2 years ago with 11 notes
#Hey Billl wanna be my pal?  #Bill Nighy  #Aunt Mary  #The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel